Let not your high mightiness forget to write to me; and I willtake care to answer,
and let you know how I am, and whatever newsthere may be in this place, where I
remain, praying our Lord to haveyour highness in his keeping and not to forget me.
Sancha my daughter, and my son, kiss your worship's hands.
She who would rather see your ladyship than write to you,
Your servant,TERESA PANZA.
All were greatly amused by Teresa Panza's letter, but particularlythe duke and
duchess; and the duchess asked Don Quixote's opinionwhether they might open the
letter that had come for the governor,which she suspected must be very good. Don
Quixote said that togratify them he would open it, and did so, and found that it
ran asfollows.
TERESA PANZA'S LETTER TO HER HUSBAND SANCHO PANZA.
I got thy letter, Sancho of my soul, and I promise thee and swear asa Catholic
Christian that I was within two fingers' breadth of goingmad I was so happy. I can
tell thee, brother, when I came to hear thatthou wert a governor I thought I should
have dropped dead with purejoy; and thou knowest they say sudden joy kills as well
as greatsorrow; and as for Sanchica thy daughter, she leaked from sheerhappiness.
I had before me the suit thou didst send me, and thecoral beads my lady the duchess
sent me round my neck, and the lettersin my hands, and there was the bearer of them
standing by, and inspite of all this I verily believed and thought that what I saw
andhandled was all a dream; for who could have thought that a goatherdwould come
to be a governor of islands? Thou knowest, my friend,what my mother used to say,
that one must live long to see much; I sayit because I expect to see more if I live
longer; for I don't expectto stop until I see thee a farmer of taxes or a collector
ofrevenue, which are offices where, though the devil carries off thosewho make a
bad use of them, still they make and handle money. Mylady the duchess will tell
thee the desire I have to go to theCourt; consider the matter and let me know thy
pleasure; I will try todo honour to thee by going in a coach.
Neither the curate, nor the barber, nor the bachelor, nor even thesacristan,
can believe that thou art a governor, and they say thewhole thing is a delusion
or an enchantment affair, like everythingbelonging to thy master Don Quixote; and
Samson says he must go insearch of thee and drive the government out of thy head
and themadness out of Don Quixote's skull; I only laugh, and look at mystring of
beads, and plan out the dress I am going to make for ourdaughter out of thy suit.
I sent some acorns to my lady the duchess; Iwish they had been gold. Send me some
strings of pearls if they are infashion in that island. Here is the news of the
village; La Berruecahas married her daughter to a good-for-nothing painter, who
camehere to paint anything that might turn up. The council gave him anorder to paint
his Majesty's arms over the door of the town-hall; heasked two ducats, which they
paid him in advance; he worked foreight days, and at the end of them had nothing
painted, and thensaid he had no turn for painting such trifling things; he returned
themoney, and for all that has married on the pretence of being a goodworkman; to
be sure he has now laid aside his paint-brush and takena spade in hand, and goes
to the field like a gentleman. PedroLobo's son has received the first orders and
tonsure, with theintention of becoming a priest. Minguilla, Mingo Silvato'sgranddaughter,
found it out, and has gone to law with him on the scoreof having given her promise
of marriage. Evil tongues say she iswith child by him, but he denies it stoutly.
There are no olivesthis year, and there is not a drop of vinegar to be had in the
wholevillage. A company of soldiers passed through here; when they leftthey took
away with them three of the girls of the village; I will nottell thee who they are;
perhaps they will come back, and they willbe sure to find those who will take them
for wives with all theirblemishes, good or bad. Sanchica is making bonelace; she
earns eightmaravedis a day clear, which she puts into a moneybox as a helptowards
house furnishing; but now that she is a governor's daughterthou wilt give her a
portion without her working for it. Thefountain in the plaza has run dry. A flash
of lightning struck thegibbet, and I wish they all lit there. I look for an answer
to this,and to know thy mind about my going to the Court; and so, God keepthee longer
than me, or as long, for I would not leave thee in thisworld without me.
Thy wife,TERESA PANZA.
The letters were applauded, laughed over, relished, and admired; andthen, as
if to put the seal to the business, the courier arrived,bringing the one Sancho
sent to Don Quixote, and this, too, was readout, and it raised some doubts as to
the governor's simplicity. Theduchess withdrew to hear from the page about his adventures
inSancho's village, which he narrated at full length without leaving asingle circumstance
unmentioned. He gave her the acorns, and also acheese which Teresa had given him
as being particularly good andsuperior to those of Tronchon. The duchess received
it with greatestdelight, in which we will leave her, to describe the end of thegovernment
of the great Sancho Panza, flower and mirror of allgovernors of islands.
CHAPTER LIIIOF THE TROUBLOUS END AND TERMINATION SANCHO PANZA'S GOVERNMENT CAME
TO
To fancy that in this life anything belonging to it will remainfor ever in the
same state is an idle fancy; on the contrary, in iteverything seems to go in a circle,
I mean round and round. The springsucceeds the summer, the summer the fall, the
fall the autumn, theautumn the winter, and the winter the spring, and so time rolls
withnever-ceasing wheel. Man's life alone, swifter than time, speedsonward to its
end without any hope of renewal, save it be in thatother life which is endless and
boundless. Thus saith Cide Hametethe Mahometan philosopher; for there are many that
by the light ofnature alone, without the light of faith, have a comprehension ofthe
fleeting nature and instability of this present life and theendless duration of
that eternal life we hope for; but our author ishere speaking of the rapidity with
which Sancho's government came toan end, melted away, disappeared, vanished as it
were in smoke andshadow. For as he lay in bed on the night of the seventh day of
hisgovernment, sated, not with bread and wine, but with deliveringjudgments and
giving opinions and making laws and proclamations,just as sleep, in spite of hunger,
was beginning to close his eyelids,he heard such a noise of bell-ringing and shouting
that one would havefancied the whole island was going to the bottom. He sat up in
bed andremained listening intently to try if he could make out what couldbe the
cause of so great an uproar; not only, however, was he unableto discover what it
was, but as countless drums and trumpets nowhelped to swell the din of the bells
and shouts, he was more puzzledthan ever, and filled with fear and terror; and getting
up he put on apair of slippers because of the dampness of the floor, and withoutthrowing
a dressing gown or anything of the kind over him he rushedout of the door of his
room, just in time to see approaching along acorridor a band of more than twenty
persons with lighted torches andnaked swords in their hands, all shouting out, "To
arms, to arms,senor governor, to arms! The enemy is in the island in countlessnumbers,
and we are lost unless your skill and valour come to oursupport."
Keeping up this noise, tumult, and uproar, they came to where Sanchostood dazed
and bewildered by what he saw and heard, and as theyapproached one of them called
out to him, "Arm at once, your lordship,if you would not have yourself destroyed
and the whole island lost."
"What have I to do with arming?" said Sancho. "What do I knowabout arms or supports?
Better leave all that to my master DonQuixote, who will settle it and make all safe
in a trice; for I,sinner that I am, God help me, don't understand these scuffles."
"Ah, senor governor," said another, "what slackness of mettle thisis! Arm yourself;
here are arms for you, offensive and defensive; comeout to the plaza and be our
leader and captain; it falls upon you byright, for you are our governor."
"Arm me then, in God's name," said Sancho, and they at once producedtwo large
shields they had come provided with, and placed them uponhim over his shirt, without
letting him put on anything else, oneshield in front and the other behind, and passing
his arms throughopenings they had made, they bound him tight with ropes, so that
therehe was walled and boarded up as straight as a spindle and unable tobend his
knees or stir a single step. In his hand they placed a lance,on which he leant to
keep himself from falling, and as soon as theyhad him thus fixed they bade him march
forward and lead them on andgive them all courage; for with him for their guide
and lamp andmorning star, they were sure to bring their business to a successfulissue.
"How am I to march, unlucky being that I am?" said Sancho, "when Ican't stir
my knee-caps, for these boards I have bound so tight tomy body won't let me. What
you must do is carry me in your arms, andlay me across or set me upright in some
postern, and I'll hold iteither with this lance or with my body."
"On, senor governor!" cried another, "it is fear more than theboards that keeps
you from moving; make haste, stir yourself, forthere is no time to lose; the enemy
is increasing in numbers, theshouts grow louder, and the danger is pressing."
Urged by these exhortations and reproaches the poor governor made anattempt to
advance, but fell to the ground with such a crash that hefancied he had broken himself
all to pieces. There he lay like atortoise enclosed in its shell, or a side of bacon
between twokneading-troughs, or a boat bottom up on the beach; nor did the gangof
jokers feel any compassion for him when they saw him down; so farfrom that, extinguishing
their torches they began to shout afreshand to renew the calls to arms with such
energy, trampling on poorSancho, and slashing at him over the shield with their
swords insuch a way that, if he had not gathered himself together and madehimself
small and drawn in his head between the shields, it would havefared badly with the
poor governor, as, squeezed into that narrowcompass, he lay, sweating and sweating
again, and commending himselfwith all his heart to God to deliver him from his present
peril.Some stumbled over him, others fell upon him, and one there was whotook up
a position on top of him for some time, and from thence asif from a watchtower issued
orders to the troops, shouting out, "Here,our side! Here the enemy is thickest!
Hold the breach there! Shut thatgate! Barricade those ladders! Here with your stink-pots
of pitchand resin, and kettles of boiling oil! Block the streets withfeather beds!"
In short, in his ardour he mentioned every littlething, and every implement and
engine of war by means of which anassault upon a city is warded off, while the bruised
and batteredSancho, who heard and suffered all, was saying to himself, "O if itwould
only please the Lord to let the island be lost at once, and Icould see myself either
dead or out of this torture!" Heaven heard hisprayer, and when he least expected
it he heard voices exclaiming,"Victory, victory! The enemy retreats beaten! Come,
senor governor,get up, and come and enjoy the victory, and divide the spoils thathave
been won from the foe by the might of that invincible arm."
"Lift me up," said the wretched Sancho in a woebegone voice. Theyhelped him to
rise, and as soon as he was on his feet said, "The enemyI have beaten you may nail
to my forehead; I don't want to dividethe spoils of the foe, I only beg and entreat
some friend, if I haveone, to give me a sup of wine, for I'm parched with thirst,
and wipeme dry, for I'm turning to water."
They rubbed him down, fetched him wine and unbound the shields,and he seated
himself upon his bed, and with fear, agitation, andfatigue he fainted away. Those
who had been concerned in the joke werenow sorry they had pushed it so far; however,
the anxiety his faintingaway had caused them was relieved by his returning to himself.
Heasked what o'clock it was; they told him it was just daybreak. He saidno more,
and in silence began to dress himself, while all watched him,waiting to see what
the haste with which he was putting on his clothesmeant.
He got himself dressed at last, and then, slowly, for he wassorely bruised and
could not go fast, he proceeded to the stable,followed by all who were present,
and going up to Dapple embracedhim and gave him a loving kiss on the forehead, and
said to him, notwithout tears in his eyes, "Come along, comrade and friend and partnerof
my toils and sorrows; when I was with you and had no cares totrouble me except mending
your harness and feeding your littlecarcass, happy were my hours, my days, and my
years; but since Ileft you, and mounted the towers of ambition and pride, a thousandmiseries,
a thousand troubles, and four thousand anxieties haveentered into my soul;" and
all the while he was speaking in thisstrain he was fixing the pack-saddle on the
ass, without a word fromanyone. Then having Dapple saddled, he, with great pain
anddifficulty, got up on him, and addressing himself to the majordomo,the secretary,
the head-carver, and Pedro Recio the doctor and severalothers who stood by, he said,
"Make way, gentlemen, and let me go backto my old freedom; let me go look for my
past life, and raise myselfup from this present death. I was not born to be a governor
or protectislands or cities from the enemies that choose to attack them.Ploughing
and digging, vinedressing and pruning, are more in my waythan defending provinces
or kingdoms. 'Saint Peter is very well atRome; I mean each of us is best following
the trade he was born to.A reaping-hook fits my hand better than a governor's sceptre;
I'drather have my fill of gazpacho' than be subject to the misery of ameddling doctor
who me with hunger, and I'd rather lie in summer underthe shade of an oak, and in
winter wrap myself in a double sheepskinjacket in freedom, than go to bed between
holland sheets and dressin sables under the restraint of a government. God be with
yourworships, and tell my lord the duke that 'naked I was born, naked Ifind myself,
I neither lose nor gain;' I mean that without afarthing I came into this government,
and without a farthing I goout of it, very different from the way governors commonly
leaveother islands. Stand aside and let me go; I have to plaster myself,for I believe
every one of my ribs is crushed, thanks to the enemiesthat have been trampling over
me to-night."